Comedy Through The Chaos

Hey everybody, happy Thursday to you. I am Miss Shannon and it is our Thursday edition of Comedy Through the Chaos where we talk about a variety of things. Hello, Speak Wonder, good to see you. I'm in my backyard today because we are pivoting because he decided he wanted to come outside and that is what we were doing. And I didn't bring my tripod out so you might be a little. bouncy today but good to see you beautiful good to see you I can take you on a little tour of the stuff that we have been working on this summer in comparison to last summer because I know last summer thirsty Thursday I wasn't going to provide it.

I wasn't going to be at a thirsty Thursday thing, but we shall see. Maybe you just gave me an idea. Junkie junk food junkie. Good to see you. So you can see what I was doing before I got out here. I feel like I'm in the season of my life where we're doing a lot of planting, pruning and weeding. So My sister and I have been doing some things out in the backyard. We decided we're going to do more gardening this season, so we have that's one of our blackberry bushes. That's our blueberry Bush that is so far surviving.

Hello, this is the additional. Blackberry Bush and then what I was working on before I got on here with you is here this particular. raised bed that we're doing. Yeah, so what I was weeding right now are these. And they look cute, but they don't get to stay. Bless you, big guy, bless you. So the reason why I was weeding these is because when I was looking them up, I mean, they were in places in this bed that I did not actively plant anything. You could see that I was kind of willy-nilly with that, and that's some broccoli and some carrots and some other stuff that we're working on this year.

But what I'm getting is a lot of what turns out to be elm tree seedlings, which I think is really interesting because they never managed to make it into the actual like any place in the yard yard. But now that I have these beds, they are thriving. So there's some that made it into this particular little pot that is just hanging out here. which is fine. They can hang out there. They've managed to go into that pot as well, which is fine. They can hang out there for a while, but they're also growing in this bed over here, which is basically a bunch of different radishes.

So I'm going to have to pull them all up because they are great, but they can't be great where they're at, which I think is interesting because sometimes you got to move things around is what it is. And that's very much an example of how this summer is working for us, is trying to be as flexible as possible, giving things a chance to grow where they choose to grow, but also being able to go through and do some of the weeding that we find necessary. And that's a good reminder to me quite often that I'm allowed to go through and go, you know what?

That is fine if it continues to grow on its own, but sometimes it needs to grow someplace else or it can't grow here because it's actually kind of in the way of what it is that we're working towards. And I'm actually really proud of the kiddo because he's been very, very reasonable for him, which I try not to create that expectation for myself. He's going to be who he's going to be, and it's my job to adapt around him. But the fact that he's been, for him, pretty reasonable, especially since he's a teenager and they can just organically be rigid about certain things, I'm pretty happy with him.

You know, today we came out. I have been slowly asking him to move our gnomes around. And he has done a good job of that. I'll show you. Deep breath, everybody. That is the gnome habitat for right now. And he elected that that's where the gnomes should be. And I went, okay, so I will make it a good spot. So we had another gnome to bring out today and he put it in that spot. And I went, okay. Oh, and you could probably see in that if you wondered where a lot of the woodchips that used to be in the front yard went, there's where a lot of them went.

So the bad thing about weeds is that they take the nutrients out of the soil, the eventual, exactly. So yeah, so I'm like, they are great, but they can't be great over there. they can't do that. Yeah, we love gnomes too. I'm with you. I mean, I always feel slightly guilty. And thank you very much for those hearts. I appreciate it. I feel guilty when I have to rearrange and go, Well, that's not where you get to live. But as you can see, you know, we find spaces for other things. So I didn't elect to pull up all of these catmints and wild daisies.

I just figured out where they get to have a place in our ecosystem. So this is where they get to live and they can be over there. But having them everywhere made it so that we couldn't have the things that we want to grow actually grow. And that's what my particular lesson I think is for this week is that sometimes you're like, that's really cool, but it just can't be cool where it is. It's got to move. So there's other stuff that I am leaving alone for now. I like to feed the rabbits out here. And so there are some wild corn that popped up because the rabbit food that I put out here has little corn pieces in it so they can live there.

That's fine. You know, kind of stuff. I'm gonna let them go there. They're not gonna be, if anything, they'll make like those little decorative corn things that maybe by the fall I'll have enough little corn cob heads that I can. do like a little cornucopia thing and there'll be some decorative corn in a basket somewhere in the front yard. But that's good. Like I've had to do some pruning and some weeding in my own life. And there's been a few things that I'm like, you know, I've been allowing that to grow for a while.

But if I want the nutrients, which is for me, my emotional capital that I have, my emotional bandwidth, my physical bandwidth, just all of these things that I actually need to make sure that I'm being specific with, I have to make sure that it goes into the soil in the way that it needs to be. So I've had to do some personal pruning in my life and do some personal weeding in my life and kind of go, you know what? You did that for a while, but you're not going to do that anymore. Or you're not going to make sure that continues to grow.

And there's been a couple of things that I had to cut out altogether so that I can get some other stuff done. And that was a big deal, you know, for me. Like I actually just told a partner here in town that I usually do an event with every summer and I have done it for. Literally like decades, like a decade I've been doing this particular thing. And I had to tell them officially, you know what, I'm not gonna be able to do that this summer. And I have my reasons and they make sense and they were appropriately disappointed, but I know they'll be okay.

Don't forget the pleasure of getting something accomplishable. Yes, that is one of the things I do like about weeding is that it is very, the completionist in you can actually go, oh look, look at all that I have. I have gotten done as far as that. And as far as that sense of accomplishments, I feel that way generally about the work that I've done here in the backyard to make it a little mini sanctuary for me and my kiddo and my sister, you know, where it's taken. You know, it's not like I did it all in one weekend.

It's over the last couple of seasons, I've gone, okay, let's move some stuff around. Let's change the layout for what we're doing here and, you know, giving myself time to go. This is something that you are going to put effort into. My next project is I'm going to fix these canopies that are out here, but that's a mini welding project. So you'll get to see some welding that I'm going to do over the next couple of weeks. So that was another reason why I just needed some to reallocate some of my time.

So as anxious as telling, right, thank you. Yeah, as anxious as I was about telling this particular partner that I wasn't going to join them this year, once I got it out of the way, I felt such a sense of relief because I knew. confidently that I was making the right decision to say, it's something that I've done before and I did for a long time, but it's not the right time right now for me to continue to do it. I need that time back to work on some other things and to move some other projects forward.

And also, as the caregiver in me, this was something that always happened in the last two weeks right before he goes back to school. And I've been doing that for, geez, since He's gonna be a senior this year, so I've been doing that since he was in middle school. The last two weeks of the summer, mom's off doing something else. No school, I know you don't wanna talk about school yet. My fault for saying words that we shouldn't say yet. It's like bringing up work in the middle of the weekend when you're like, I'm not ready to think about that.

So he's right, I'll use his code words. But the concept of having that time off this year and being able to start into the next when I take him back, you know, to his place and we get back in that routine really was appealing to be able to have that space back and go, you know, what will it look like if instead of ending the summer with this flurry of activity and then having to drop everything and the day after Labor Day get him up and moving and back. If I could actually wind things down and actually have that time to get in this space.

Ah, I just saw say the magic school. You're right. The magic bus. I'll say the magic bus. That's a good idea. And so knowing that that was a change that would be very very freeing and appropriate for us was enough to get me over that hump of the anxiety of going hey I have to weed this activity out of our summer and go oh wait that's something that I've always watered and now I'm like nah you don't get to be there anymore because you're not adding any nutrients back into our soil. So I'm looking forward to this There are a bunch of things that we get to get working on.

Before I wrap with you guys today, I'll show you a little bit because I know that that pile of wood chips looked daunting and you're like, what is this woman going to do with all those wood chips? So there's wood chips there. There's wood chips all along this fence around these plants. There's wood chips over there that I moved over here and where a bulk of them went are over here. Like there's two more places I have to show you. But this is where they are doing the bulk of the work is that's his, you've seen me talk about his hot tub before.

So that's where his hot tub is. So this space over here under the trees, it's not only is this a very shady area in our yard, it's also a mulberry tree. So the mulberries drop down here. So they just would just cause a mess. And it was a place that didn't really grow no matter how many things I tried that normally do well in the shade, it just didn't do well in here. So I'm already excited and it's been such a great thing to have those wood chips over there because I can just kind of like sift them when the mulberries fall.

And so it's made it for a lot cleaner, cleaner experience back here. And then a bunch of the wood chips went over here next to... back of the house. So that pile was put to good use and the neighbors got to use it, some of them as well. So spend some time reevaluating what is in your garden, what is taking the nutrients out of your soil as we shared here in the chat, and then being bold enough to go, you know what, that's really great, but it's time for me to pluck it out. I gotta pluck it out. And especially if you're somebody that likes having things actually be done, You feel bad at first, but then when you pluck one of these little things out and go, you gotta go someplace else.

I got you, Junky Junky. This just doesn't get to be where it's at. I think I might keep a few of them and see if they grow big enough that I want to plant them elsewhere in the yard. I might keep a couple that are in that pot and just see if they grow big enough. And then they can be trees other places, they just can't be trees in our vegetable garden. Should I make? I'll take a vote from you guys. I usually, you know, I'll do a little bit with the mulberries every once in a while, but I kind of forgot, but I have a whole tree full of them.

Maybe I'll do some mulberry wine. I need to pull the weeds over committing. Yes. Okay. All right. Speak wonder. We're going to workshop that with you right now. I get how you say that you chickened out. My thing. That goes back to what we talked about over the last couple of sessions. Where do you do your list? How do you do your list? And so if you put it on your list to not commit to something or to turn something down, then it becomes more of your to-do. So whatever it is that you need to say no to, put it on the list.

Like it was on my list. to tell this person I was not returning. And so I had time to prepare for it like you prepare for any other task that you have so that it helps you not chicken out. Because it helps you go, no, I knew that this person was going to end up contacting me about doing this event. I had already prepared for it. I had already spoken it to myself and put it into the universe in our house. I had mentioned it to a couple of friends who are the friends that are supportive of the things that I do, not the whole pokers.

You can't tell your whole pokers because they'll help you chicken back out. You could share it with me, SpeakWonder, and I'll be happy to go, Kathy, you said you weren't going to do this, Kathy, stop, and empower you. Then honestly, when I got the message from this particular person that said, Hey, I just wanted to talk to you and see if you're coming back to do this event, I sent a little message to my said, hey, pray for my strength when I tell them no for this thing. And so they were already being supported.

Yeah, learn and relearn boundaries. It's a continual thing. I like the way that you said relearn. Thank you for phrasing it that way, because it is something that you have to continually work that muscle. And it falls off every once in a while. Because I have to do the same thing. I have to do the same thing, Speak Wonder. But I do remind you that the more you do it, the easier it works. And those little tricks of figuring out what it takes for you to stay in that cycle. So for me, sometimes it's the way that I name what it is, is being very clear on what that time is actually being towards, being put towards, even if it's something that you normally-- because for me, and maybe you're just feeling, Kathy, just don't put your boundaries in line in the sand.

But yeah, agreed. I love the way you said that, junkie. Put it, put it, don't put it in the sand, put it in the concrete. And sometimes you have to work up to that, you know, kind of thing. And so for me, Just because of the way I'm wired, if I said, hey, I'm leaving this time because I need to recharge, that's something that will permanently stay in the sand. It's very difficult for me to go, that's in concrete. But for me to go, no, I'm giving this time back to my kiddo for X, Y, and Z, it's much easier for me to have that stay in Junk Food Junkie into the concrete.

Take those two things, work it together. What's your concrete? What can you use to anchor those things in and make sure that they make sense? And the more you can do it for that-- if you anchor it into time that you're spending with your mom, as much as you deserve that time for yourself too, you'll probably be a lot more likely to keep to that boundary if you're like, no, I can't. And then you have to back into that as well and go the other things that make it so that you still have to write, you still have to recover, you still have to do those other things.

And the more you go, this is preparing me to be able to be a better caregiver, to do the work that I'm supposed to do, to refuel myself as an empath, all of those things are required. And the more you, as Junk Food Junkie goes, figure out how to anchor those certain things in concrete so that you don't give them up as much as possible, then the other things eventually come. And that's what I'm saying from experience is that it really has been a process over the last couple of years for me to get better with my boundaries and to figure out ways where I'm going, this isn't a bad thing that I'm saying that I'm going to leave space for this.

It isn't a bad thing that I took these few minutes to go and do something silly that just fuels me. That's important, and it's necessary. And the other things are going to work themselves out. It'll make you better at what you're doing. And so we all know that. I think that's one of those things that we go, hey, we know we should do that just like we know that we should hydrate more and try and sleep. Do we do that? Who knows? Who knows? So my goal is that we're going to do a little weeding while we're outside.

When we're inside, we'll do something else. We're going to work on some stuff. I also plan on doing a little post about the process of pulling all of these little things out so that they are no longer taking up space because I actually need to uncluster some other plants so that they have space as well. So I always consider hanging out with you one of the things that I am leaving space for because it's important to me uh thank you very much for being here because you fuel me and hopefully I fuel you as well and that we can always Workshop together how to keep moving especially in this very complex time where every day the universe is gaslighting us into thinking that things are not weird and complicated when they are ah You know what, Kathy Joy, you know where to get ahold of me.

Yes. I think I can help talk you through that. That's something that I have to do. I got you. Yes. Yes. We'll chat. We will chat. I get it. Plus, if you're a perpetual pleaser, you don't know how to not do it. You know me. I just hold on to. It's just like the spin bike. It's gone. All this stuff is gone. It moves like it made sense. it felt so much lighter once I got rid of that bike, just like it felt so much lighter once I was like, hey, I'm so glad that you hit me up. And I did it in a kind way.

I could have just sent him a text and said, I'm not coming. But no, I talked to him, talked him through and I said, I just have some other things that I'm doing. And so you will feel lighter after you get through the heavy. It'll be heavy for a minute. I literally had a little pit and a little knot in the pit of my stomach, but then once you're gonna go in your room. Okay, we can go in the room. Are you getting hot? Okay, we can go in the room. So we're gonna go back inside y'all. And if I go that way, my internet will bounce and then it'll be all weird.

So I might as well say goodbye later. Say goodbye now. But thank you for joining me. I will keep in touch and let you know how the weeding process goes in effect. Hopefully, We will get to the point that I have something actually to show you. Those are the potatoes behind me. They're doing the best. The potatoes are doing okay. It's hard to mess up potatoes, I think. You have to literally drown them to make them not happy. But I will report back on what dos. And SpeakWonder, we're gonna come up with a list for you.

I got you. That's something, you brought it up to the right person. I have notes. I have notes and I'm happy to share. So we'll talk through that. So ping me or I'll ping you. So I appreciate you all. If you end up watching me in the replay, make sure you check everybody out. Junk food junkie, great posts. Make sure you guys check them out. I think you normally drop them on Tuesday, right? But I find them whenever we find them. So I always appreciate what you're doing. Kathy Joy, I always get to see you as well in the mornings here on Thursday.

So thank you very much for sharing everything that you got to do and being honest and vulnerable because we all need to be able to Go ahead and rally the troops and figure out what we do. So good day to both of you. Good day to everybody that ends up watching us. Make sure you pop around here in the cadre sphere and let us know what else we can do. You are welcome. You are welcome. So just remind yourself that you do deserve to take care of yourself. I want to make sure that you understand that I appreciate being here with all of you.

It fuels me and hopefully it fuels you as well. So thank you for being here. I'm always sorry if I end up missing you, but hopefully we'll all manage to rally the troops. So I adore all of you. Thank you very much. I hope that the day treats you well. And if it doesn't, shame on it, not shame on you. We'll see you very back here soon. 00 AM central.