I just fear what is up. It is so fabulous. To be in this space. This is your first time here. I'm Dr. Cherice Johnson. I'm a licensed clinical mental health therapist. Therapists mindfulness practitioner and author. But more importantly, I'm a human. I am someone that who believes truly that there are many. Ways to be well, and I'm someone who's very glad. That you are in this space. Right now, typically when you come into this time with me, I encourage you to do two things. One. Let me know where you are in the world.
Because it's a beautiful reminder that we're not alone and you never know, you might end up connecting with. Someone that is right around the corner. We've seen it happen. We always talk about cadre in real life. And even though we are. Community here in this space. We also want you. To recognize that community is all around you. And we are truly better together. The other thing is write your week. So, whether you're listening to this in the moment. Or you're gonna listen on replay. Let's just check in right on a scale of one to 10.
How would you rate your week? One meaning is rough. You're out of it. Or 10 meaning given everything that you're managing. Your life, not anybody. Else's. Else's you feel like you are doing. Your absolute best. And if you're weak as a 10. Don't be afraid to give yourself a 10, a 10 is a 10. If I had to write my week. I would give myself a solid nine. Doesn't mean this week has been great. It's been a little crazy. But considering the craziness, I do feel like. I'm doing as well as possible. Showing up in every way that a possibly can.
Focus of today, five. Signed you are more overwhelmed. Than you realized here's our opening quote. Overwhelm. Doesn't always look like. Falling apart. Sometimes it looks like functioning. But barely feeling like yourself. Hello stays bro. So, how do you know if you're comfortable, please place your thought? Thoughts in the chat. How do you typically know. When you're overwhelmed. And I want you to think about. How do you speak to yourself? What do you notice physically? What do you notice about your.
Appetite for me, one of the key ways that I know that I'm overwhelmed is I start becoming really. Forgetful like beyond just your normal level, I will do something and not remember what I'm. I'm doing and just kind of feel like things are really. Slow and frozen. And, and that means that my system is just. Completely overwhelmed. That most of us think that overwhelm is obvious. We think it looks like. Crying or shutting down or saying I can't do this anymore. And sometimes it does. But sometimes it can also look like still answering emails.
Emails still going to work, still taking care of everybody. And still getting things done. Like, let's be honest about that. You can still be functioning. And completely overwhelm and you're just using. Way too much of yourself to do it. So here are a few. Signs that I want you to kind of think about. And maybe give yourself like a little check mark. Um, as I go through. And maybe on a scale of zero to five. You can note, how many of these are you experiencing right now? All right. Sign one small things feel big.
So the email that isn't, that serious feels. Really serious. Someone asks you one more question and you internally think. If anyone asked me for one more thing, I'm going to lose it. Oh, I have been there. When your nervous system is overloaded. There's a less room between stimulus and reaction. So you will find. Yourself in a place where you're like, I'm about to lose it. This was me. If I can be honest. Yesterday yesterday. I was at a place of overwhelm. To the point where I actually knew. Let me reschedule this meeting.
Because I knew that there could be an exchange there that I would react to differently than. Normal because I had come into the day. Overwhelmed. So here's something that I also wanna ask you. Has any of you been irritated by something this week? That normally would not have bothered you. If, so just go ahead and say, it's me, or give me an emoji with your hand raised. Raised, if any of you this week, like me have found yourself irritated with something that you're like that doesn't. Doesn't normally bother me, but this week it did sign number two.
You can't make seemingly simple decisions. Decisions? What do you want to eat? I don't know. What time do you wanna go? I don't care. Which one do you like, please stop asking me questions. So when simple. Questions and decisions for really difficult. You're experiencing decision fatigue, which is a direct sign of overwhelm. So sometimes. I don't care can really mean. I don't have the bandwidth to decide. And I feel like that's not only helpful for us to know about ourselves. That's also important for us to keep in mind.
When we are dealing with other people. So you might find that you ask somebody else a question and they're like, I don't care. Whatever you want, and you might think what is wrong with them? Why are they not? What. It may not be personal to you. It just could be a sign that they're in decision fatigue. And they are overwhelmed so we can respond with, Hey, are you good? Like you normally kind of gimme a little. Bit more insight, and that's a way to keep that from escalating sign. Number three. You are forgetting things you normally wouldn't, like I said earlier, you walk into a room and forget why.
You miss an appointment, you lose your keys. Or somebody tells you something and five minutes later, you're like, it's gone. What did they say? And let me add, this has nothing to do with your age or. Your gender. This can happen to anybody at any given point. But it may not mean that something is wrong with you. So a question that you can ask yourself is. How much is my brain. Carrying right now. Because sometimes your brain is not failing you. It is just simply overloaded sign four. You are either doing everything.
Or nothing. So you're in the land of all or none. And this one is bake. Some of us respond to overwhelm. By becoming hyper. Productive. We clean everything. We fix everything. We answer everything. We keep moving. Other times or sometimes other people. Freeze you're in like a functional freeze. You scroll, you avoid you procrastinate. You stare at your list and absolutely do nothing about it. And some of us do both. We over function until we crash. All right. Here's your opportunity to out yourself?
Which one are you? When you're overwhelmed, do you have a tendency to be. Hyper-productive or freeze or both. I wanna say I'm typically. I think I lean more towards hyper-productive. Like, I'm like telling myself if I can keep going and get everything done, then I'll. Stay out of freeze that does not work. It is not true because typically I work myself. Into freeze because I'm doing the most. But what are you? Okay? Yes. I see that a couple of you are also both. Sign number five rest. Doesn't feel restful.
You finally sit down, but your mind is still working. You're watching TV while mentally answering emails or. Maybe tangibly answering emails, you're lying in bed. Thinking about tomorrow. You're technically resting. But internally you are still on duty and this is important. Being still is not the same thing. As feeling safe enough to rest. Right. If you checked three four or five of these. Your next move. Is not recommended. To push harder. It might actually be to reduce your load. All right. So if.
You find yourself in this situation and feel free if you're comfortable. Sharing what your numbers are. And let me go through those one more time. For those of you that are just coming. In. So we talked about five. Signs that you may be overwhelmed and not know at number one, small things feel big number. Two, you can't make simple decisions. Number three, you're forgetting things. You normally wouldn't. Wouldn't number four, you're either doing everything or nothing. And number five, rest doesn't feel.
Restful. So you give yourself one point for all of those. And then you can let me know where you are now. If I answered these yesterday. My score would be very different than what it is today. But I would say on average over the last week, I've been running at about a four out of five. So I'm taking. My own advice and working on reducing. My load here. Are two ways that you can support yourself if you are in that place of overwhelm or. Someone that you know, and love and support is in that place.
One reduce before you regulate. So before you add another coping skill. I want you to ask yourself. What can come off of my plate. Not how can I become better at carrying all of this? Or I. Should be able to do no. What can come off of my plate, even if that just comes off of your plate. For a little while. Okay. What can be delayed? What can be delegated? What can be declined? Declined. What expectation can be lowered today? Because sometimes the answer to overwhelm isn't. Isn't another big, huge plan.
It's just less. Right. You don't necessarily need to tell me what that. Thing could be for you, but I would like you to think. And identify over the next 24 hours. What is one thing I can remove? Delay delegate. Or decline, always an option you can share if you want to, but you don't have to. I'm also proud to say that I actually just did this. I declined an invitation that I had for the evening that I had. Already said yes to, because I needed the space. And I felt so relieved in doing it. So number two, shrink the next step.
When your brain is. Overwhelmed. Don't keep asking. How am I gonna get all of this done? That question is way too big. Instead, try asking yourself. What is the next smallest most useful thing I can do not the whole project. Not the whole week. Not fixing your entire life by 8:00 PM. One email, one glass of water. One phone call. 10 minutes, one boundary. Maybe you just actually need to eat something and slow down. An overwhelmed brain. Needs clarity more than complexity. So it's like doing the next right thing.
One step at a time. Okay. I wanna leave you with this. Your overwhelmed is not a sign for you to try harder. It is a bigger sign to reduce the load. So that you can operate within your current capacity. Notice the signs you're overwhelmed. Reduce the load. Shrink the next step. And then remember you don't have to wait until you fall apart. To decide something is too much. The moment you notice that. You can pivot as always thank you for coming into this time in this. Space, take a deep breath. Before you move into the next moment.
Come back to this space whenever you need to. And remember you are more than enough to get through everything that's on your plate. I'll see you soon.
