Sober Not Somber Hour

Hi, everyone. Welcome in. Welcome in to Sober Not Somber Hour. I'm your host, Jen Barale. Yeah, here we are. January 13th in the city of Minneapolis. Yeah, come on in, y'. All. We're just gonna. I'm gonna make a beverage like I usually do because I, despite everything going on in the world, I'm trying to bring some normalcy to my day. Making a little grapefruit lime elixir cocktail. So this is a favorite. Earl Giles has this grapefruit lime non alcoholic mixer. So I do about an ounce of that and just add a little bit of my favorite bubbly sparkling water, San Pellegrino to it.

And that's likely going to be the extent of my conversation about bubbles today. Because things are happening. Things are happening in the world and right in our neighborhoods. So I am about 13 blocks from 34th and Portland in Minneapolis, and my daughter is even closer. She's eight blocks west of the murder of Renee. Good. And where that took place, helicopters, things, you know, disrupting our environment from just the perspective of being in this community right now, let alone the Instagram feed.

And seeing it all play out, seeing it all play out, it's. It's wild. So I'm on here today. Hi, Carrie. Hi, Rachel. Great to see you guys. Cheers to you and thank you for showing up. That is actually pretty refreshing. I've just been working up since 6am this morning and we'll get a break this evening. Gonna be gliding in sauna and talking about the same topic I'm gonna share with you today, which is rest and replenishing to create space for resilience. And I shared a bit about this during a sauna guided session on Saturday for community at the which is a sauna community on 43rd Nicollet here.

And you know, people needed it, need to be in community. So it's tempting to isolate and stay home and live in fear, that is for sure. But I am continuing to host events and hold space as I can for people. So the topic of the conversation on Saturday and what I want to share with you all to be thinking about is what it means to armor up today in America and specifically with what's going on right now with ice infiltrating our city. And you know that that word armor up is one to me of like a statue of aggression or getting ready to go into war or a, you know, tumultuous situation that could easily escalate.

And when I think of armor and I just want to share this with you all, I also think of so strength like an inner strength and having a voice because the voices out there are loud and the F bomb is everywhere and there's anger and aggression everywhere. Violence begets violence and that's what I'm seeing in my feed and rightfully so. And then there's also this armoring up of humanity. Where is our virtue? Where is our humanity in all of this place, political or not, where is our humanity when we see what's happening to our neighbors?

So taking a lot of deep breaths over here and thinking about that word armor. So I'm going to read to you what I shared with my sauna and sobriety community recently. And just to share a little bit of thought. So whether warrior, protector or healer, fill up your cup, replenish your mind, body and soul to be well know that community and support can be found in the sauna, on the bench and in conversation. It's critical that we take care of ourselves so that we can stay in it, all of it, for resilience and responsiveness to what we're being collectively called to do in our community.

So I shared that. Just putting words to some of the roles that I feel like I'm being asked to play. I'm asking them of myself. So I don't know if any of those resonate with you. I think it's a daily thing, It's a moment to moment thing. Much like sobriety, like staying in it, right? Like the uncomfortableness, the fear and the idea of in any given day and in the sauna, I was talking about Saturday, January 10th in particular because I went to the Powderhorn park area where there was an incredible amount of people protesting.

I think they said 50000 blocks and blocks. And we walked down Portland from Lake street to Portland and the site of the memorial for Renee. And that's where my daughter And I, who's 22, kind of, that's how we spent our day. And so I, I felt like I had like that armor of a warrior on, like witnessing, protecting, voicing, all of that. And then I went into protective mode for my daughter, like thinking about, solely thinking about her, paying attention to what must be going on in her world and navigating, you know, as a 17 year old Covid.

And now, you know, here we are again with these same feelings of fear in our community, just a different. A source, different source, same sort of feelings that are being evoked of fear and helplessness and loss of control. So in that protector role, thinking about her and her safety. And then finally healer, you know, that evening in the sauna, trying to hold space for people that needed it. And so I would just encourage. And what I want to share with you all today is, you know, paying attention to how you're feeling in your body, what you're taking in in terms of media and your mind, and knowing that we all have to hold it all.

It all coexists. It all coexists. And I have literally a 3, 13 events that I've planned for the course of January, and I'm doing them, I'm gonna still do them. I mean, I don't know how many people care about being alcohol free, but certainly trauma and what we're experiencing can lead to alcohol misuse as a coping mechanism and it can lead to more isolation. So is definitely connected mental health and sobriety. So. So if anyone, you know, needs that sort of help, the Cadre community is here for you.

And, oh, gosh, even just now, where I live, there's. There's just been a lot of people. I can just tell, like, heightened tension because people are honking at each other. They're. The streets are a little crazy, whistles are. Things are happening. And on the flip side, of course, there's always also humanity. I'm running into people in my apartment building and then the neighborhood who are making eye contact for extra long. How can I help? Like, there's always that. There's always that. Yeah, Rachel, you could hear the honking.

And it's like, I. I don't know, people are just vigilantly watching everything and if they see something, they're calling attention to it, which apparently we all need, you know, we all need to be doing this. So. So don't, you know, heads down is no longer a thing. Paying attention, which is the theme of this week on the Cadre sphere. And that was created, you know, a month or so ago by our leader, Rosie. So isn't that interesting, right? Paying attention. Paying attention to how we're feeling in our body and knowing that rest is critical.

I've been taking time to take naps as I need to because I can't fall asleep at night. And it's one of my only times I get to, like, kind of spend time on media. And then why do I do that? Right? I want to be informed. But at the same time, right before bed, looking at all that content is a lot to process. So oftentimes I'm up later and then I just need a nap during the day. So I. Is anyone else feeling that? Just the weight of that. And what are you doing to cope? What's your current coping mechanism for all the things we have to hold?

My dog here, my golden doodle chooses to whine. That's his coping mechanism. He's pretty cute, though. Yeah. Carrie. The fear creates so much more chaos. You know, I can't help but thinking and I, you know, I can't imagine ever being in these situations that we're seeing on, on film. But the escalation, right, Violence begets violence. So the tone that these agents are using naturally causes someone who is vulnerable or just going about their day to react in a very vocal way. And I have seen, I saw one particular post from an attorney who was super calm and, and engaged with one of, you know, the agents questioning him in a really powerful way.

I don't know how. I honestly don't. Can't even imagine how I would show up if that were me in that situation. But we, in order to even see the possibility of that, I think this rest and resilience, as much as we can create for ourselves, we need to make that happen. So I'd invite you all if you're thinking of, you know, what. What role are you playing right now? Are you feeling warrior empowered to make change? Are you focused on protecting someone, your family? Are you in a mode where you feel like you might have capacity to have conversations with others, help others heal?

I'd love to hear it. If you care to share, put. Put it in the chat here as I'm sipping my. And a cocktail. Seems a bit ridiculous. Yeah, both. All the rules. Carrie says both. Yeah. So I would just encourage you all to be thinking about healing and how we need to stay in this for quite some time here. I mean, we're mid January, and I don't know that it's going to get better before it gets worse. I just, you know, obviously no one knows. Yeah. And Rachel stopped regularly watching and reading anything news a long time ago.

Yeah. And that's also where we choose to get our media news from those sources. And you have to be like, armored up, I think, sometimes to like, open your phone and look at that stuff. It's, it's. Yeah, it's a challenge. And I'm trying to coach my daughter through all of this. And she said to me the other. The other day, she said, mom, you know, in Ukraine, she's heard students talk about constantly being bombed, like, and at any given day, and the noise from the helicopters, you know, causing ptsd.

And these, you know, individuals are still finding, having to find joy in their lives and go about their day. And also just the fact that that's their norm. That's their norm. Just hearing all those noises and thinking, well, I guess it could be me at any given point, but still somehow going about your life and day, it's incredible. And you know, our youth should not be faced with that. And that's a whole other conversation. But I just wanted to come on today and, you know, share support as we can in community and know that in addition to Cadre online, we have, you know, all of us in the Cadre sphere are available for one on ones the contributors to talk and hold space for anyone that needs it.

So I appreciate you all chiming in. I certainly hope by the time I come on next week there's more promising updates. I really hope so. I see action being taken and the rising up of people to demand to find the humanity in this. So love you all, thanks for joining in. And however you know you're, you're coping and moving through your day, know that Cadre is here to support all of it. Cheers everyone.