Leading with 💕 Love

Hello, Cadre sphere. Anila here. I like to rhyme. I love alliteration and rhyme. If you want to get me something for Christmas, it's alliteration and rhyme. Welcome to Thursday, November 13th. I don't actually know. Oh, yeah, November 13th. Wow. There's like only a few weeks left in 2025. Hello. Speak Wonder. Welcome, welcome, welcome. Hello. Susan. Susan or Suzanne. Ah, sorry. Hard to know how to pronounce things in this world that we live in, where all we see is like, account handles, I guess.

Well, I'm Anila. I am one of the. I've been in a Cadre sphere for a few weeks, a few years, and maybe it's been a year. I don't know how long. Wow. My. My brain is like all over the place right now. I'm thinking about many, many things. But I'm Anila. I am cozy in bed right now because I don't know why, but I'm exhausted today. Ah, Speak Wonder. I was curious what you meant by stop that. And it's that it is saying, the year is almost over. I got you. It's so true. It's like, it's funny. It's like at the end of the year, it's always, wow, where did this year go?

And I think it's oftentimes with a lot of regret, right? Like a little like, not like, wow, it was a good year, but it was like, oh, crap, I didn't do anything I wanted to do this year. I don't know, give me a thumbs up if it feels like that for you in that way. But that's, that's kind of. I think what you're getting at in is like, don't, don't say it right? Don't say it. Don't say it's almost over. Because now we only have three weeks to get the things that we had on our January 1st resolution list done right.

But maybe that's something that we can talk about today, that idea of regret. Maybe we have to not be so hard on ourselves when it comes to that stuff. I think it's really important that we. This is something I'm doing right now. Whiteboarding out. Okay. What do I want to be accomplishing? What do I want to be working on? And not all of it's going to come true in the next one month, six months, one year, five years. But I think giving ourselves a roadmap helps create. Right? It's kind of like you need boundaries to keep your car on track.

And those are the values of, you know, should I go this way, Should I go that way? Should I say yes to this? Should I say yes to that? And I think that's the values that you have that can guide you there. And then you got the roadmap of this is where I want to go, so then you can kind of make those choices along the way to get there. I like that visual. Yeah. Well, tell me how your Thursday night's going and what you're thinking about and what you're thinking about for the next four or five weeks that we have left in.

Or maybe six weeks that we have left in 2025. I'll tell you for myself, I am trying to just figure out what I'm doing in life. Who is. Who is not trying to figure that out? Who has it figured out? Maybe they should be the one doing this Cadre talk. Sometimes I feel like I have it figured out. And I think that's the beauty, is that nobody's got to figure it out. What I think I do have figured out, though, is something that I wrote in the description for today, which was, what would you do if someone was pushing on, like, the back of your seat on an airplane over and over and over?

How would you react? And the reason I'm asking this question is because. And the reason I'm saying, hey, I think I have, you know, something I want to work on is I saw a video on Instagram that I can no longer find. But interestingly, I can find similar videos that feel super fake and recreated. But basically what happened in this video was someone was kind of sitting, like, here, like. Like me, like, right now. And then over here were two people sitting in their seats across the aisle on the airplane.

And the person in back kept banging this guy's chair, right? And then this guy's big guy wearing army fatigues was like, hey, come on, stop. You know, didn't look back, just take my Stop. And, you know, the guy stopped for a second and then did it again. The guy's like, come on, stop. You know, you could tell he was getting angry. And then the guy stopped and then did boom, boom, boom again. And so the third time, the guy unbuckles and is like, hey, what are you doing? Turns around, looks at the guy, and instead of knocking him out, he gives him a hug.

Now he gives him a hug because he saw him. He saw him, and it was a friend of his. And so here's the thing that I want to work on and I want to challenge you to work on is that reaction. But for a stranger, that Reaction of, oh, it's just you, my friend, messing around. I don't need to get angry. I can just give you a hug. A hug attack. I love that squeak wonder, right? You'd be super, super annoyed. Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. Right? You're trying to like, just watch a movie or go to sleep.

And so that is. But that idea, okay, like this guy, obviously, you know, I really hope it was real, but you can never tell on inst. On know social media anymore if things are real or staged. But, you know, he turned around and he gave his person a hug and was his person. They clearly knew each other, right? And so what if this idea of being seen, what if I can work towards trying to see everybody as my brother or sister, and what if we all try to see that in each other? I feel like today was a really good day for me in doing that, holding the door open for people.

Like even I was. My kids violin lesson was today. And so I dropped him off and then I ran a couple errands. And one of the errands was picking up. I got some CDs burned onto a. Onto a thumb drive like the files. And this woman walked in before me and she had something to, you know, start a new order. And so I was like, oh, I'm gonna have to wait here, and then I'm not gonna have time to go do my other thing. And then I was like, whatever. Like, I'm just gonna wait patiently and quietly and just let them do their thing.

And then immediately the guy was like, oh, wait. Like I rec. You know, he recognized me. He was like, you're just picking up, right? And I was like, yep. And he was like, great, let me just take you real quick and pay, you know. And I was out of there. And I, you know, looked at her. I was like, you okay with that? She was like, sure. I was like, thank you. You know, have a good day to both of them. I'll never see that. That person again. But she was kind to me, I was kind to her, and we're both better for it.

And yeah, that's leading with love, you. You know, what if a person that's honking at us on the street, that's probably me most of the time because I'm always like, come on, move. But what if I can change that? What if I could say, oh, this person's, you know, really needs to be on their phone right now for maybe there's an emergency or this person's just add another coffee yet. Let me give them Grace, how do we do that? How do we allow ourselves to see other people that we don't know? This actually takes me back to National Night out in August.

Every second, every first Tuesday, I think in August is National Night Out. And the idea is that you work with your neighbors to close down a street and you all get outside and you have like a potluck and you meet each other and. And again, it was Violin Day. And so I was sitting outside the violin teacher's house. I haven't heard the circle poem speak wonder. So if you can somehow copy paste it here or post it maybe into Cadre and tag me, I would love to hear it. I would absolutely love to hear it.

Or read it, I guess, technically. Or maybe that'll be your live one day this week reciting it for all of us. Or maybe all those things. But yeah, I just. I just wish we could see each other. So this National Night out day, I'm sitting in my car waiting to pick up my son, and this guy comes by, he's like, you better move, cuz I gotta block the street. And I'm just like, I just need five minutes to, like, get my son. He's like, you better move. You gotta move. And it was just crazy. He drew a circle that shut me out.

Oh, okay, you're giving. You're giving me the poem. So I will wait for all of it to come through, maybe, and then we'll read it together at the end. And I just wish that I was seen in that moment. I just wish that, you know, he. He was like, in his mind, he was like, you're not a neighbor because you are in a car parked here, but you're not in a house parked here, right? Or like in a house here. And it was just like, so bizarre because I live seven minutes away and we, you know, because of that, he.

That person and I go to the same target. That person and I go to the same, like, you know, all the. All the things around there. And it was just like, so silly. Like, I just felt so unseen in that moment. And he was very rude. He was very aggressive. And he had his son with him. And I literally was like, come on, what are you teaching your son right now? That to get what you want, you have to be a bully. It was. It was really, really disgusting. But what if he had seen me? You know, what if he had seen me?

We could have made friends. We could have been, you know, maybe there was a connection that could have been made there instead of a disconnection and so that's. That was the question that I wanted to ask you. What would you do if someone did something that was really, really p****** you off and you turned around and instead of berating them, hating them, you just saw them as another human being just trying to get by. And that idea of drawing a circle, that shut them out. But love and I had the wit to win.

We drew a circle that took him in, right? Oh, what a beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing that. And I think if we could live in a world where our leaders chose to do what you're saying, speak Wonder, to draw them in, draw that circle and take them in, I think we'd be in a very different world. And the scary thing is I think a lot of us are trying to say the same things. I picked up this book, you know, I don't want to get political, but I picked up this book. It says, how to destroy American Three Easy Steps.

And it's by someone who's more right wing. I'll be honest that I am a little bit more moder. I think I'm more moderate than left than I thought I was in terms of being leftist. But the jacket of this talks about, oh, yes, speak Wonder. That would be awesome to know who wrote that because super, super cool. But the fact that, you know, it is also like, kudos. And so, you know, I read the jacket of this book and it says here, I wanted to just see what really, really there was something here that it's just so interesting, you know, a growing number.

I don't know if you can hear all the noise next door in my. The other bedroom. The family is having fun. A growing number of Americans want to tear down what has taken us 250 years to build. And they'll start by canceling our shared history, ideals and culture. Okay? So that when I read that a growing number of Americans want to tear down what has taken us 250 years to build, okay, like, this guy is someone on the right. And so clearly he's talking about people on the left. But someone on the left reading this is like, oh, they're talking about someone on the right, you know, where we have the same in us in a sense.

So I'm actually very excited to read this because I really, really, really, really, really want to understand what it is and how the words are getting twisted to divide us. And maybe from that we can figure out how to see each other and how to hug each other instead of wanting to punch each other's lights out. And so with that I hope that this was helpful to you in your own life of now taking that idea of that challenge of can I start seeing strangers as my brothers and sisters and showing them the love that they deserve, showing myself the love that I deserve so that we can keep living in that abundance.

So I'm wishing you love, strength and awareness. Thank you for taking time with me tonight. Good night. It.