Introducing Me… Dating Coach Here!

All right. Hello everybody. I am Michelle and this is my first live stream. So am I doing this right? I'm not sure. We will find out a few things that I just want to say right away that you're gonna find out about me anyways. I know that sounds really like racy, but it's just that I have a dog. I have a dog. His name is Lucky and he is probably periodically gonna make his presence known because he's unhinged and he likes to be by me. But that aside, I am Michelle. I am a dating coach in the Minneapolis area and I am new to Cadre.

Today is the first day that I got collaborator like rights rights. So I thought I would just hop on this live stream and introduce myself and tell you what I'm about and let you know what I'll be posting and get any feedback from you guys about what you want because this is really all about you and the community. I also think it's super important to know about who you're listening to. I was just looking over the different collaborators on Cadre and there's a lot of really cool people on here with really cool backgrounds.

And I think when you're listening to somebody and getting feedback, taking their advice, I think it's important to know where they come from. Right. What is their background and it's impressive the people on Cadre. And I'm really happy to be here and to be one of them. So as I mentioned, I am a dating coach. I started a business called Unstuck by Michelle. It'll be five years this summer. So five years ago. But to rewind even further, I'm a mental health therapist. I've been practicing as a mental health therapist since 2011.

That is going to age me a little bit. I just turned 40. Hey. But I've been a mental health therapist for quite some time and about five years ago I, you know, I was wanting, I felt this drive to do more, to do something different. And given my own history, I'm tell you how I became a dating coach and how this idea came to me. Don't worry, I will get back to you and why, what I'm here to add to the community. But as I mentioned, I want you to know a little bit about me. So I was in this long term relationship several years ago.

I am now married, but that was several years ago and when we broke up I was like, I can't wait to date. Dating is going to be so fun. I am going to thrive. I'm going to find love. Like, I was excited. I was new to the world of online dating. That wasn't a thing back when I was dating, before my long relationship. And anyways, dating wasn't that for me. It was really hard. It was really hard. And I learned a lot about myself. I learned a lot about other people dating. And it's just a really vulnerable space to be in dating, right?

You're putting yourself out there, you're meeting people, and you're hoping that it goes well. You are letting people get to know you. Part of dating is heartbreak. There's just ups and downs. And so after I was dating for a while, I learned I had to do a lot of work on myself. I had to do a lot of just introspective work and learn about me, learn about my attachment, my anxieties, those types of things. And during my dating year years, I went to speed dating. If you've ever been, I'm very interested to hear what you think.

But I went to speed dating. And after that, you guys, I went home that day and I said, I'm writing a book on dating. Like, people just need some help, right? These people I was meeting, like, I felt like nice people. I didn't really know them, but I was like, they just need some support with dating. And so that's when this started kind of brewing in my brain. And then like I mentioned, the summer of five years ago was that 2021. 2021 is when I started my dating coaching business. So what am I doing here?

What am I going to bring to the table? How is dating coaching part of this Cadre app, which is a mental health and wellness app? Well, we know, like I said, dating isn't always rainbows and butterflies. It can be really hard, right? It can be hard within itself. And it can be hard when maybe you already have some. Some anxieties, some negative beliefs about yourself, maybe some history of relationships that haven't gone very well. So dating can be hard for a lot of reasons, and it directly can impact your mental health.

And so when I heard about Cadre, I was like, I want to be part of this. I want to be part of this because I think a lot of people have a hard time talking about dating in a way that is helpful, right? A lot of people in the dating world are jaded. A lot of people giving dating advice. Like, I remember some of my friends giving me some wild advice, and I took it, sometimes unhinged advice. I was like, I should call him 10 times in a row. Just kidding. No, I did that Before I told you it was unhinged.

And I will share dating stories on here with you all as well. But dating is really hard. I don't even know what I was saying before that, but dating is really hard. And so with dating coaching, what I do is I work with people one on one, and I can do that through this app as well. And I help people explore what. What is getting in the way of dating for you? Right? Do you have a tendency to ignore red flags? Do you have a tendency to get really nervous so that when you show up on dates, maybe you overshare or maybe you shut down?

Are you not very confident? Right? So does that just not make you want to date at all? It's hard. It's hard. And it's hard to ask for help. I think rewind. That's what I was saying before. It's hard to ask for help. It's hard to ask for help. And so this space on Cadre, I am here to just talk about dating. I am here to provide support and to teach you some tips and tricks to cope with anxiety around dating. I am here to help. Tips and tricks to build confidence around dating. Tips and tricks on how to kind of navigate dating apps and how to meet people in the wild.

All those things that it can be really hard to ask for help. And what's the wild thing is what the kicker is, is that for some reason, I know the reason. I've been there. It's hard for people to say, like, I really want a partner. I really want a partner. I'm lonely. It's really hard for people to say that. When we think about, like, evolution, people survived longer in pairs. They just did, right? You had someone to cuddle with. You were warmer. Caveman days, right? You could sleep while someone protected you.

Like, there was just. It was stronger in pairs. And flash forward to present day, we're not. Most of us are not living in caves, but it's easier with a partner. Companionship feels good. And you don't have to be ashamed to say that you want companionship. Right? I. I think there's this big drive. When I was dating, I remember feeling like I had to say, I'm a strong, independent woman. Like, I don't need no. I don't need no man. But I wanted one, right? Like, yeah, a lot of us can do things on our own and.

And it's okay to want a partner. That doesn't make you weak. That doesn't make you anything. It makes you human, right? So I think I covered it all. Ooh. One more thing I wanted to say is like my background is in mental health. As I mentioned, I've been a mental health therapist for several years. I've been in private practice for a little over 10 years and before that I worked in non profit and in schools in residential treatment. Youngest clients 12, oldest client 75. Right. I've worked through kind of all ages and my specialty in private practice is trauma and attachment.

So with what I know about trauma and attachment, I tell people as a dating coach, like, I'm not your therapist, I'm not your therapist. Some things need to be worked out in therapy. However, I can't. I know what I know. I happen to know a lot about the brain, the body, the nervous system, relationships. And so I will bring that to the table. I will bring that education to you all. I truly believe the more you know about the why, right? Why do I feel this way when I go on dates? Why is this so hard for me?

Like the why. When we understand the why, we can work on it, right? And so I can't. I know what I know about those things and I do bring those things to the table. So as a dating coach, if you hear me on here talking clinical, sometimes it's just who I am. Like, it's just who I am. And sometimes I will provide some education on trauma and anxiety and how that can show up with dating. And your job is to recognize if that resonates with you, right? And some of the stuff I say might and some of it might, might not.

Another thing too is as a dating coach, oftentimes I remember when I started, like my Instagram TikTok. By the way, follow me at Unstuck by Michelle with two L's, that's important. But when I would tell people to follow me, my friends were like, well, I'm married or I, I don't care. Because a lot of the stuff that I talk about with dating coaching can, can be transferred into other areas of your life, right? When we work on confidence with dating, that' going to show up at work, that's going to show up with your family, that's going to show up, I was going to say in the streets.

But like in the streets, if you walking your dog, if you're at a grocery store, like, you might walk a little taller, you might just enjoy life a little more. And so this, if you're not single, right? If you're married and you're like, oh, this Michelle girl, she's not for me. Give me a shot and if there's things that you want to know about, like that maybe you don't think it relates to dating. I bet I can relate it to dating. I bet that I can. So just let me know. I am really here, like I said, for you all.

So, again, short and sweet. I just wanted to introduce myself, Michelle o', Connell, and I'm from Unstuck by Michelle. I'm not exactly sure when I will be doing my lives. I want to be consistent and I would like to ideally do twice a week, but I know I will for sure do once a week. So just, just stay tuned. Feel free to comment, anything that you want to hear about. Specifically introduce yourself. I am very excited to be part of this community. It is Friday. It is 3:40 and I really hope that you have a lovely weekend.

Thanks for tuning in. Peace.