Lately, I’ve been sitting with this quiet kind of guilt. The kind that pops up when things finally slow down enough to think. It sounds like: “You should be doing more.” “Remember all the things you wished you could do as a kid?” “Now you have access… so why aren’t you doing all of it?” I know I’m not the only parent who carries that. Caregivers especially. We measure ourselves against some invisible checklist of experiences and opportunities, and somehow it always feels like we’re behind. But here’s the part that surprised me. With everything going on right now, I realized that letting go of certain plans has actually eased some of that guilt. Not because I stopped caring. But because I noticed what has been working. We’re really good at being resourceful. Really good at creating safety, joy, and connection right where we are. For a long time, I focused on helping my kid find joy and regulation at home. Not because I didn’t want to go places, but because that’s what worked for us. And now, in a season where the world feels more dangerous and less predictable, I’m honestly grateful we built that skill together. It doesn’t feel like making the best of a bad situation. It feels like recognizing that adaptability is a strength. Instead of feeling like I’m taking something away from him, I’m realizing we’re leaning into something we’re actually good at. This doesn’t erase the hard stuff. The guilt still shows up sometimes. But it’s a reminder that success doesn’t always look like more. Sometimes it looks like stability. Sometimes it looks like creativity. Sometimes it looks like finding joy exactly where you already are. What’s one place you’ve had to adapt instead of push forward and found something unexpected on the other side?
A lot of my parenting guilt comes from thinking I'm not doing enough. But then I realized that I'm giving him so much more. There's less guilt, more creativity, more connection. And, no, it's not exactly how I picture things, but somehow it's working.
Here's a weird revelation I had earlier today. A lot of my parenting guilt comes from thinking I'm not doing enough. You know, like, enough outings, enough experiences, enough big moments, because those are something that I wanted when I was a kid. So now that I have the resource to do some of those things for my kid, I feel like I'm not enough. But then I realized that I'm giving him so much more. And especially with everything that's going on right now, I. Here's the unexpected thing. We're actually really good at being resourceful, really good at finding joy wherever we are, including right here at home where we're safe.
And so now, instead of feeling like I'm taking something away from my kid, it's been really freeing to go, no, you're doing the best that you can with what you have. So there's less guilt, more creativity, more connection. And, no, it's not exactly how I picture things, but somehow it's working. So what's something you realize that you're better at than you gave yourself credit for?
