Rules Of Engagement

Oh, hey there, Cadre. Hello. Hello. Hello. It is Wednesday, January 27th. No, that's not even correct. It is Tuesday, January 27th. That's where my mind's been. Things back home are a little rough for a lot of people right now. I am very, very aware of that. And I'm sending so much love to Minneapolis. I'm sending so much love to Minnesota and to St. Paul, to Hennepin and Ramsey County. To everybody, just to everybody in the sound of the voices of Minnesota and everybody who hears the sounds of those gunshots that have been fired at American people for no good reason and except no reason that makes sense outside of the internal logic of authoritarianism.

So I'm actually not going to talk exclusively about that today, but it makes no sense to me to show up here and not say something about it. And thank God for Cadre, because we all have a place to go where people are talking real talk about what it means to support yourself through trying times, whether those trying times were 40 years ago, when we were young, 10 years ago when we were going through our divorce, or right now as we are walking through historic moments in the United States of America.

So the topic this week is beginning again with no pressure. And if that. That's actually very appropriate right now. I imagine there are a number of people who had big ideas at the beginning, probably not today. But I am aware that there are people who've had as much time as I have who have gone out. I am aware that I have a daily reprieve based on my spiritual condition. So I spend time with my higher power every morning as one way to have the life of my dreams. Because drinking means I wouldn't have it, but it is a chronic disease prone to relapse.

Right. And if we shamed everybody who came back in the door, we would have a big problem in recovery. So beginning again without pressure. I have a lot of rules of engagement. You know, I'm not surprised to learn. It's been interesting doing this process because I've learned things that I have a lot of rules of engagement report and things that I do not have very many. That has been an interesting journey with all of you. But what are some of them that resonate with beginning again without pressure?

Rule of engagement number two, start from where you are, not from where you want to be or where you think you should be. It's like my number two rule of engagement. That's not going to change. I am going to be reordering these at some point in the next weeks or Months. But number one and two will not change. Love what you love and start from where you are, not from where you wish you were. And. If you had an intention and you lost it, you got a lot of valuable information because you know, you have ideas about what led to it.

You don't necessarily know. Hi, Anna. You don't necessarily know. Would you have an idea? Right. If world issues made you think, I'm just gonna put on my pajamas and sit around the house all day and watch television? Like, it made me think. Well, and for you, world issues are local. You have some information that when things get super s*****, pardon my French, You know what you long to do instead of what you've chosen to do. So there's that. You've got to start from there. Start from there. If you're in a space where you just want to sit around in your pajamas, jama, staring at the wall.

And I keep bringing that one up because that's. That's my default. Like, I don't have substances anymore. So I've got, like, TV and books and quiet, cozy spaces with my cats. That's what I've got. But I can't live my life there, or the things that I've chosen for myself don't get done. And part of what I've chosen for myself is to have an impact on what's happening in the world. So it's been a rock and a hard place, but. And I've mostly chosen the harder place, which is put myself out there anyway.

Start from where you are, not from where you wish you were. Number six. For now. Choose the bigger life. Sometimes taking a very quiet day, a very quiet day is the bigger life for me. Like today. I don't have a lot of media and I don't have meetings with other people. And I can seek those things out, I suppose. But I am very grateful for it because the last couple weeks, most days, there have been something inviting me further out of my comfort zone than I've been invited in a while. And I am doing my best to rise to that challenge because it is part of what I can offer this moment.

But some days, the quiet days, is choosing the big, is choosing the bigger life. Like today, I'm working. I have tons of stuff to do and catch up on things that are by the wayside, but choose the bigger life. Number 23, I got from Dave Novak talking to John Acuff. And he was the president of Yum Foods, which includes KFC and Taco Bell. And he invented Cool Ranch Doritos, which If I could have anything on my resume that isn't already there, there's a few things, but invented cool ranch Dorit would be a delightful thing to have on the resume anyway.

One of the things he said was solve the biggest problem that happens most frequently. Like, if you don't know what to do, this is more about your life. But this is in any system that you're part of. Solve the biggest problem that happens most frequently. So perhaps if you are wondering how to proceed in this moment, what's the biggest problem that happens most frequently? Getting in the way of that. Only you can answer that question. But I have found that a very. It's like a little adjustment from my brain to be like, oh, I don't have to solve every problem.

What's the biggest problem that happens most frequently? And then figure out some solutions for that. That number 33 is straight out of politics. Plan your work. Work your plan. Starting and beginning again without pressure. Plan your work, Work your plan. Now, you have to do all this in context. Starting again without pressure also means you have a new context, right? Many of you, if you live in Minnesota, you have a context right now. Even if you are doing your best not to pay attention to what's happening around you, even if it doesn't make sense to pay attention what's happening around you, you are still living in the smog of international events playing out in your local community.

And that is some pretty heavy sm. So you can still go to work in it. You can still walk, run, play in it. You can still do everything you were doing before in it, provided you don't have a lung problem. But it doesn't mean you aren't breathing it in. It doesn't mean that it isn't making your sky greater. It doesn't mean that it isn't having an impact on your internal things, even if you can keep functioning. So you're in a new context. And as you begin again without pressure, part of taking the pressure off is understanding the new context.

Johnny Cuff says, new season, new scorecard. Y' all are in a new season. New season, new scorecard. Hello, Emily. Y' all are in a new season. So if you're going to begin again at anything, you have to do it with a new scorecard, understanding that you are living in this smog environment. Number 38. I was mentioning this before. This goes along with what I was saying before about you have a whole bunch of new data. This is my most recent rule of engagement. And it's capture the insight, capture the idea if you have an insight about something, about anything.

And if you have an idea, you know, an idea for a book you want to write, or an idea for how to solve that lingering garbage can problem or whatever it is, Capture the insight. Capture the idea. The older I get, the more I understand my brain is not retaining things the way that it used to. Now that may be the tail wagging the dog because the more I write it down, the less I have to use my functional memory. But I have. I use Evernote on my phone and I capture all my. I have an ideas for every single month for the last three or four years.

And I just. If I have an idea or an insight, I just write it down on that list and then I have it captured and I can do what I choose with later. Having a review process where I go back and look at them. Having a consistent one is one of my goals for this year, but they're always captured there. And the last one I will really talk about is one of my favorite. This might be my number one guideline for life. This isn't sort of a rule of engagement so much as it is a perspective that I can hold. And it is very common saying the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago.

The second best time is today. Whatever you're going through, whatever you think you should have been doing or yada yada, it's. You are absolutely correct. It would have been great to start eating a salad every single day a year ago, like you plan to do a year ago. That would be great. But the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. Absolutely. But the second best time is right now, is today. And I had that as a goal last year. And I do eat a salad every single day. There are only a handful of days in the last year, plus now year and 20, however many days that I have not eaten a salad with more than one vegetable in it, even.

Although there are days when it was just like cabbage, cut up cabbage and maybe some celery. But that's better than some beats none. It's better than no cabbage and no celery. So start from where you are, not from where you wish you were. Which is sort of the cousin of the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. And then the second best time is now. Yeah. So beginning again without a ton of pressure is great. And it is the pathway to success. I read today that success doesn't rely on intensity.

It relies on rhythm. Right. Meeting a goal doesn't rely on intensity. It relies on rhythm. So maybe ramp back significantly, whatever it is you're expecting yourself to do right now, either because you weren't able to maintain it at the expected intensity, which is usually true, but also many. You know, even if you don't live in Minnesota, the entire world is aware that big things are afoot in the United States of America. And that is. That is the smog, that is the gray Paul that people are wearing.

And it helps to ramp back significantly your expectation of what you're gonna do. You don't have to give it up. You don't have to give it up. I have lived through difficult, historic times as a busy leader and. Stayed sober that I keep working out for the most intense parts of it. I did not often always work out, but the rhythm mattered more than the intensity. I did something and I just kept going. You know, I went to Orange Theory Fitness, I think the entire time I was there. And. And I went this morning.

That isn't to make you feel. It isn't to be like, well, if I could do it, you could do it, too. What I mean is I ramped things back significantly, but I didn't always stop. There were some things I just didn't tackle at all. I did not eat a salad every day when I was mayor because the stress was so bad that it was very hard for me to eat raw vegetables. My system did not allow for that. So I pivoted and I did my best to eat cooked vegetables at least once a day. And sometimes just a green juice was all I could manage.

That's what I mean. That's what I mean about. Maybe expect a little less of yourself going through the middle of it. Maybe it's not a salad every day. Maybe it's like a little green juice. Who knows? Whatever it is for you, Ana says you needed this. I'm. What I'm going to say is, look, it's possible, first of all, to get through this with your integrity intact. Second of all, The things you're doing to cope should help make your life better, not worse. There are some solutions that are actually just additional problems, and you are not required to add more problems as you try and solve your problems.

I would include in that. Anything addictive. Anything addictive I would include in that. And. But there are solutions that do help you feel better. Community is often one of them. Sometimes quiet alone time is one of them. But either way, either way, it is possible to begin again without practice. And for me, I would say without pressure means new season, new scorecard. Understanding what you're laboring under. Take the smallest step you need to take to move forward. But you can keep moving forward.

And sometimes moving forward is, this doesn't make sense to tackle right now, and only you know any of that. But you're not alone. And thank God for Cadre, because you have a place to go. You have a place to go. You have a place to go. All right. That is my statement about beginning again without pressure in the middle of local, you know, worldwide events, happening very locally for many people on Cadre. That is what I have to say. And I think y' all are great. Have a great week. Sam.