Abundant Leadership ✨ Looking Within

Hello, everybody. Happy Monday. We're here. I'm pulling a JC and a Luke. A little music in the background. I find that music is inspirational. I find music can help us move and reset. Hello. Hello. Welcome. Happy Monday. I've been playing some music in the background just to get us in here. If anybody can name this group, I'll be shocked. But I'll also be excited. I would offer trivia prizes, but that's not possible. Well, I mean, anything's possible. My name is Jean Nicholls. I'm excited to be here.

It's Monday and if you're wondering, that was the Allman Brothers whipping post was the name of the song. Hello, Kking sc. How are you today? Excited to have you here. Anyone else live in a state where all of a sudden stocking caps become like the new accessory for everything, like all day long. I feel like I wear stocking caps most of the day just to stay warm. I live in Minneapolis. That's where I'm calling in from today. And today on Monday, I'm really excited to be here. Junk Food Junkie. Hello.

Good morning. When you come into a conversation with me, it always brings me great joy. If you can type into the slack or into the channel in the comments, something that's bringing you joy today or even simply, how do you feel right now in this moment? Good afternoon to you. How are you feeling in this moment? Or what's bringing you joy right now? So I'll share really quick because I can't ask and then not share, right? I'm feeling full. Not full because I ate too much for breakfast, but full in my heart.

I got to have just a check in with a good friend and mentor of mine. And it, it, I never know what direction it's gonna go. And today this individual asked me some really hard questions and I kind of got like, I cried a little bit, but. But they asked them from such a loving place to just really see how I'm doing and check in with me and, and continue to challenge me. And then I was able to do the same. So it works both ways. So I'm feeling full right now. Junk Food Junkie says you're excited for Thanksgiving and spending time with family and friends.

I love that. Thank you for sharing. It's fascinating, right, that the holiday season is here. We have less than. What is it? What's the date today? So we have roughly. I'm fast mathing 35 days left of the year. We have the next this week and the next four weeks after are going to go really Fast. And then we're going to flop into January and we're going to take a breath and go, woof. That was a lot. Good morning, Zach. So on this week, on Thanksgiving week, I thought it would be a really great opportunity as we come together to take a look within.

So when we're leading and leading authentically, one of the things that I really try to do is just be super present with our teams, super present with my clients. And in general, I try really hard to be present. Here's an extreme way of which I can be present at times. People will often ask me if I'm looking forward to a trip, and I. My mom used to ask me this all the time. She'd be like, jean, are you looking forward to going wherever I was going? And I would be like, no, Mom, I'm excited to be here with you right now.

And she would be like, no, like, really? Like, are you excited about this? I keep thinking about where you're going, and I can't imagine what it's going to be like. And I will say. I would say to her, again, mom, I'm not excited for it yet. And she would ask me why, and I would tell her, because it's not here. And what happened is many, many years ago, I would put so much emphasis on my excitement for what was coming that I missed where I was at and the moments that I was in because I was so excited about something that was coming.

And then I would go on the trip or I would go. I would do the activity, whatever it was, and I would walk away feeling a little deflated because what I had created in my mind didn't match exactly what the experience was or did it, because I had a certain perception of what it would be. And then what happened was just different. So I've now given myself permission to celebrate being in this moment and give myself permission to celebrate what that experience will be when it arrives. So that took a lot of time for me to go inside, to look inside to see what was happening when people would ask me the question, what was happening when I would have those experiences.

Now, I don't know if any of you can relate to that, but I do find that it's really important for us as leaders to take a look inside to see what's going on. And when we're in a conversation with maybe our team members or people that report to us or even our bosses, they might say things or do things that somehow activate us. And that activation could be anxiety. That activation could be an emotion that Activation could be a frustration. So if we assume positive intent, a phrase that is used in our household often, if we assume positive intent, that someone else's perspective just might be different, the real question becomes, what about what they said or did created an activation within me?

Now, I had an experience last week, and I'll share an example, working with one of the people on our team. If you're new to working with me, we own an indoor cycling studio and there's a member on our team that I was doing some work with. And historically, I might have gotten triggered by certain things or activated by certain things, but in this conversation, what I did is I took time to pause and just hold space. And I've been practicing this a lot more in the last. Probably off and on for the last few years, but more intentionally over the last few months as I'm really trying to evolve and grow again, and as I'm coaching more people, I find that it's really relevant when I have lived experiences to share as well.

So in this moment, I found that by my participating in an idea, started to activate the person on our team. This person is newly taking over, helping to be a coach to other people on our team. It's an indoor cycling studio. So we have a bunch of instructors, and I was offering up some ideas based on my experiences, and they started to spiral. And I stayed neutral in that moment because I've had this experience with this individual before, and I know that it's not about me, it's about something being activated with them.

So I allowed them the space to have all the emotion. And then I came back and said the statement, please assume positive intent here. This is over text message. And my intention is to create a space for you to be able to do this coaching meeting that you're going to have, but also help you to recognize that there's not one best way to get there. And in that moment, that individual took a pause and they were like, oh, I thought you were mad. And I thought you were trying to take over. And I said, no, my job is to simply hold space for you, help you be set up for success.

And at the end of it, when you're done with this particular process, we can have a conversation and see how it went. Now, three years ago, Jean probably would have just inserted herself into the entire thing, and they would have been right. But today, Jean just sat in the moment and held space for them because I understood that they were being activated. And I allowed myself to go inside to do my own check to see am I being activated myself? Nope. Am I holding space for them? Yes. Do they understand that I'm holding space for them?

No. I need to clarify. So being a leader isn't always about defining the path. Being a leader oftentimes is about using our lived experiences where we've grown and learned, where we've stumbled and falled. That's not even a word, fallen. So that we can use that shared experience as bumpers or guideposts. Being a leader, sometimes we feel like we're supposed to have all the answers. Sometimes the best answers don't come from us. But it takes a lot for us as individuals to go within, to really identify what is the emotion that's happening around this conversation.

Why am I being activated? Why are they so junk food? Junkie? You stated in here at work, you lead by example, which got more production out of my crew because I was working right along with them, doing the same work as them, and I earned. I earned the respect. Exactly. So that is one of your talents. That is one of your strengths, the ability to work side by side with your team. Not everybody has that strength. However, if we can get out of our own way just long enough to remember what it was like when we were in their jobs, then maybe it will start to shift our perspectives.

So when I, when I, when I consider that. A good example for me to share with you is I coach oftentimes a lot of senior leaders, and I was working with a leadership team in finance, and we were going through a really big transformation. And my invitation to each leader was to write down on a piece of paper their memory of what it was like when they first got their very first finance job at this company or any company. What was it like? What was their experience like? Which manager do they remember?

Which manager supported them? Who was their mentor? And I asked them to actually write down their that memory in as much detail as they could. And then I asked them to look back on that and say, how would you have managed that version of you? Because if you're going to lead a team of 100 people or 200 people from this level up here, you need to remember what it was like to be the person who came into the door fresh every step in your journey, what supported you and what didn't. And when they did that exercise, when they went inside, to really remember what helped them to become the best version of themselves, to get to the position that they were, it changed the message and the stories that we shared with the entire organization because they had forgotten that at one point in time, they sat in that seat too.

So, junk food junkie, I love that you roll up the sleeves and go side by side at our studio. Yesterday, Zach went into the studio and worked side by side with one of our brand new people. And it's another way in which they can see that we're right there with them, sharing our lived experiences, trying to meet them with where they're at. Oh, junk food junkie, I love this. You're retired now, but never forgot where I started in your field of work, and that's why I still worked as hard as your crew did.

I love that I find great joy. I have several hats that I wear. I find so much joy when I get to spend moments in our spin studio because it reminds me what it's like to begin beginning the journey. So sometimes to be the best leader, it simply requires us to go inside. We have all the answers. We have so many beautiful lived experiences. We've succeeded, we have failed. And I don't even like that word. I call it learning. We have plot twisted and we have arrived into this moment being this version of us, which is amazing.

And so my invitation to you this week as we go into a holiday and we're supporting our teams or our colleagues or our friends, nieces, sons and daughters, some of them might come into Thanksgiving sharing stories about their moments, their work, their lives. And when we can go inside and recognize that we have so much wisdom that we can offer and we can remember our journeys, we have gifts to share. So this morning at this coffee with this friend and mentor of mine, I got to remember a lot and they got to share a lot of their memories.

And together we could share our lived experiences in ways that could lift each other up and Exactly. There are no problems. There really are only solutions. And I think what we tell people at our team, even if I just look at the studio, is there's nothing that they can't do that we can't fix. So make a decision, move forward. And if there's something better or different we could do in the future, we'll learn from it. So thank you all for taking time this morning. I hope you all have a beautiful holiday.

I'm gonna pop in later this week as a little just jump in and to do a check in of gratitude. And I hope you all have the most beautiful day today. And however you're feeling, feel that. Feel all of it and know that it will pass. So I'll see you soon. I'm grateful for all of you.