Join me as we explore the power of savoring in relationships—learning not only to give but to truly receive. Discover how slowing down, accepting care, and embracing small moments of love can strengthen connection and restore balance in your life.
Dr. Jessica Green is a licensed therapist in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. She supervises LPCAs and CEU providers. Today we're going to focus on personal growth, mental health.
Mel Robbins: Many of us struggle with savoring in relationships. She says we often forget how to receive a compliment. Robbins: Notice the good not only in yourself, but notice the good in others. She suggests three ways to practice this in order to savor relationships.
Good morning, Cadre world. This is Dr. Jessica Green, and I am joining you for our live session this morning. And we are going to wait for some others to chime in, and hopefully you can see me this morning. There we go. And I am, for some of you who may be joining us for the first time or haven't seen us in a while, I am Dr. Jessica Green. Good morning, Brianna. And I am a licensed therapist here along the Grand Strand in Myrtle Beach. But I'm also licensed in North Carolina and also licensed in Florida.
Good morning, jules. I supervise LPCAs who have just earned their license and need their two years under supervisor. And then I'm also an LLR CEU provider. So I provide CEUs. And this is our renewal year, so it has been a busy time for us. Good morning, Jules. Today we're going to focus on personal growth, mental health, but making sure we are and continue to have that sense of gratitude. So I want to talk about something that many of us struggle with, and it's savoring in relationships. And when I say savoring, it's more that sense of gratitude, that sense of accepting a compliment when it comes to validation and not catastrophizing thinking.
Worst case scenario. So this is especially for those of us who are givers. We give, give, give, give, give. Good morning, Jenny. We show up, we pour out important to others we love deeply, but often we forget how to receive it. And we're all guilty of that. I can say I am guilty of it as well. And when we think about relationships, they are not just about what we give. They're about the balance of giving and then also allowing ourselves to be nourished in return. So I want you to think about the last time someone complimented you.
All right? So think about that last time someone complimented you. Did you pause to receive it fully, or did you brush it off with a comment of saying, oh, it's nothing? And, ladies, sometimes we do this. When someone says, oh, my gosh, you have an amazing dress on. Oh, I love your shoes. We say, oh, this old thing. I just pulled it out of my closet. As opposed to just saying thank you. You know, we can think it, oh, my gosh, this old thing. But we verbalize and say thank you. And many of us do that.
And in doing so, we rob ourselves of the joy of that compliment and that joy of being cared for. So when we talk about savoring relationships, it means slowing down to notice the good. But notice the good not only in yourself, but notice the good in others. It's about letting your partner's kind gestures or your co workers or your family or your friends linger in your heart. It really means hearing that friend say, I appreciate you, and letting them appreciate being a friend, being a loved one instead of rushing past it and being in that moment speak, wonder.
Thank you for joining us from Erie and Briana, she said, sometimes I'll accept it. And then I over explained for no reason at all. And it feels like that false acceptance. Absolutely. You know, allowing ourselves to sit in that moment as opposed to rushing through it and accepting that compliment. So why is this important to us? It's important because we consistently give to others, which leads to burnout, which leads to resentment, and which leads to feeling invisible. So sometimes, as I think Briana mentioned, those moments where we feel as if, oh my gosh, I cannot accept that compliment, accept it, feel that sense of gratitude, allow that other individual to pour into us because we're always giving, giving, giving.
Someone's giving us a compliment, but we're not fully accepting it. And that can lead to burnout, that can lead to resentment, and that can lead to us feeling invisible. So I want you to allow yourself to savor that moment, whether it's giving them a hug, where there's laughter, there's words of affirmation and saying thank you and allowing them to fill in your cup, or fill your cup, I should say, and then strengthen your connection with others. So I want to talk about some ways that we can practice this in order to savor those relationships.
The first thing I want you to do, I want you to pause before you deflect. In other sessions, we talked about the importance of responding and not reacting. So in that moment, when someone says something kind, I want you to resist their urge to downplay it. I want you to take that deep breath and I want you to say thank you. In your head. You may say, oh my gosh, this old thing. But I want you to verbalize and I want you to verbally say thank you. The second thing is I want you to name that moment in Myers.
Mel, I'm so glad you're working on this because we're all work in progress with this. It's not a sprint, it's going to be a marathon for us to take that deep breath and for us to say thank you. The second thing is I want you to name that moment. When a loved one does something thoughtful, I want you to acknowledge it by saying out loud, that really means a lot to me because this creates that loop of gratitude. All right? And then the third thing is I want yourself. I want you to let yourself feel it.
Notice how your body responds when you're cared about, when someone's acknowledging your feelings, when someone's acknowledging your worth and your value. You know, does your chest feel lighter? Do you feel yourself smiling more easily? And I want you to savor that moment and be in the present. Sometimes when we're not fully there, we're not allowing ourselves to savor that moment, and then we tend to rush into the next thing. So I want us to let ourselves receive those compliments, receive that sense of gratitude, because I want us to acknowledge it as a gift from the other person that's given it to us.
Yes. Make sure you feel it. So when we accept that care, those words of affirmation, feeling validated, we affirm their role in our lives, and we strengthen that relationship. So as we end this live session again, I want you to remember three things. I want you to savor that moment. And realize savoring that moment isn't selfish. It is essential for balance, and it's essential for those healthy relationships. Number two, receive it with gratitude. All right? And this allows both individuals to be feel.
To feel seen and to feel validated. And the third is, I want you to start small, like today. Let someone compliment you. And if someone compliments you, I want you to receive it by saying thank you and allowing it to land here. So the next time someone pours into you, I want you to pause, I want you to take that deep breath, and I want you to allow yourself to savor it. Because as relationships grow and they grow strong, both parties will feel honored, both parties will feel loved, and both parties will feel that sense of gratitude.
As always, continue to be courageous, continue to have compassion, continue to build connections, and always be true to yourself.
