we're back I don't know for how long but I thought I would try it like a third time I don't know what's going on with my Wi-Fi today but there's was a whole prequel to this maybe six seven minutes Hey T North yeah so I usually start at four and then I timed out a few times anyway and I'm also like while I was waiting I was sipping with intention during the sober not somber hour my choice today is Tennyson which I love yeah I'm just gonna jump right back into it and talk about safety in terms of relationships and what has been promised to us so I was referencing being you know three years divorce being in relationships and yes we go under and back I'm gonna get it being in relationships to me had always been a promise thing like somewhere in my 20s I was just you know enamored with the idea of falling in love getting married having kids and having that marriage be like a really safe place for for growth and essentially feeling like I would be set for life if I got a ring on my finger and got married well recently divorce as a three years ago so 20 plus years in a marriage and not necessarily a safe place in that marriage for a lot of reasons and then I'm also finding that now as I'm getting out of another long- term relationship and being single and what I'm noticing is that I have not for a very long time in my life felt like I could be safe in my environment or even being a single person it feels like I'm a little like a bit a little bit of a you know fish out of water here like I just have always been ingrained that being in a relationship is to feel safe and to be taken care of and so what happens when that is no longer an option and you are your own safety you're your own safety you're you're providing that for yourself yeah I've been thinking a lot about that and also kind of thinking about how I give my time and energy to others like if I'm starting today and again how does that feel is that feel safe not all the time I almost feel sort of safer on my own and protecting my energy so it's a totally new experience in my life to be looking at you know age 53 and on like might be a reality for me I might not you know be in a relationship with the significant other so what does that mean yeah love everyone chiming in here in the society timeline Rachel oh my gosh yeah I mean that was like 28 you know get yourself married start your family get get going and it did it actually did feel sort of safe and comfortable yeah and liberating and terrifying carry yeah all at the same time all at the same time but that's what I'm experiencing I'm right right in it Rick says yeah inner vows I have been going deep and creating like a sense of safety for myself and recognizing that I don't necessarily need to be in that close personal relationship to have safety is it nice yes but also when that's not available to us what are the sort of things that we're experiencing I'd love to hear anyone chime in on thoughts of three years and years and years and have
