Sunday Serenity

Happy Sunday to the Cadre sphere, Jason Lennox. Here you can see it's completely dark. We went through the daylight savings time, which is beautiful. Got an extra hour of sleep, which felt incredible. But now it gets really dark late at night, and I am just having the ultimate debate in my head about whether or not it's time to put the Christmas tree up, keep a little light on in the house. So, anyhow, happy to be here with you. Jason Lennox. I am your resident recovery champion. What that means is I'm here to talk about all things recovery from substances as well as mental health.

I think they're so intertwined that it's hard to talk about one without the other. And by champion, I just mean I'm a champion for this work, with this work, in this work, both as a person who's been through addiction, mental health struggles, suicidal states. Hey, good evening, Jules. Always good to see you here. And then somebody who works in the industry and gets to do things like this, share content that hopefully adds value to people's lives when we talk about mental health and recovery and substance use.

And, you know, one of the things I've been talking about last weekend I posed a question, and I do want to hear from those of you who were on last week, but the question I asked was, how you doing? It's a little bit of a campaign. I told you I was going to launch at this past week. I did Wednesday night, went live with that. And what it is is really a fundraiser for a good friend of mine, actually what used to be one of my best friends who passed away to suicide just a few short weeks ago. And so there's a fundraiser component for his kids, but then there's also an awareness component.

And that's what I was talking to you all about. And that's what I want to share with you. And when I asked that question, how you doing? How do we check in with the people in our lives to actually ask how they're doing? So I had this conversation with several people last week. It was at a conference, our biggest conference in the state. And one guy said, it's just like, there's not enough meaning behind that phrase. And that question has just become more of a greeting than anything. And I talked a little bit about that last week and I said, absolutely, but there has to be something broader.

And I think it's this time we instill a different kind of meaning into that. In other words, how do I actually stop and check in with somebody and find out how they're doing? And so I think, you know, again, the campaign went live last week. I've continued to push it and try to get creative in different ways and actually raised something to the tune of $1,600, just over a couple days for the kids, and got a couple more thousand that are matching donations to that. So it's been a lot of fun. It's going to culminate on birthday.

Oh, look at Jules. Got it shared on her Facebook page. Thank you very much. It's. It's going to be on his birthday, 1114. He would have celebrated his 40th birthday. And actually, this morning, I had. I was thinking about his kids and, you know, asked the question what it would be like to lose their father at the age of 39. And I realized, like, it just hit me, oh, my gosh, that's exactly what happened to me. How did I not know this, but make this connection nonetheless? That whole campaign is about how do we check in with people.

Of course, there's some money for the kids. That's great. But how do we check in with people in our lives? Because I was at the conference, and this woman came up to me and she said. We started talking. She had done a little speech, and we were interacting a little bit, and as we were saying goodbyes, I was kind of making a move to go to the next thing. She kind of pulled me back in, and she said, you just lost somebody in your life, right? Someone very tragic, and said, yeah. And she started tearing up, and she said, you know, thank you for sharing what you shared and asking that question.

You know, you never know who really needs to hear that? So she had these tears in her eyes, and it was very clear that this impacted her in some kind of way. And maybe she was just on the receiving end, on the right day at the right time. I don't know. Point is, that's why we continue to have the conversation. No, mental health is like we think about mental health versus physical health. I've got a great aunt, an aunt who's got cancer. She's gonna be 70 years old, and she's gone through cancer for almost half her Life.

I'll say 35 years, three different rounds. This last one has been about seven years, and all of it's been terminal. They said, there's nothing more we can do. And somehow she's still hanging around, doing the deal, which is great. It's just a testament to who she is as a person. But anyway, when we look at that, we think about that. I have that conversation. I can openly share about that. And people understand, people have empathy, people have sympathy, people just feel for what she's going through and just kind of like they're on board, they get it and they're like, this is wow, what a powerful woman to be able to do this.

Everybody's on our team fighting, right? They have all these events, we go out and we fight. And unfortunately it's not the same way when we talk about mental health. I even found my own friend Brandon here that I was hesitant to share the word suicide. And part of it's good because we want to be sensitive to those things. But at the same time, we continue to create this world where it's hard to talk about when we don't speak openly. And we don't have that again in physical health near as much as we do in mental health and behavioral health.

And so it's very unfortunate, but I did it anyway. And it's, it's brought so many conversations to me, new connections, listening to people, seeing another person who's not doing well and hearing about this person who's. Who survived suicide and just engaging in all these different ways. This is the reason that we have the conversation. And so I'm just. My point in all of this is how do we continue to talk about mental health and just normalize the conversation for what it is? It's the health of our mental state.

Just like we talk about physical health. Am I exercising? Am I eating right? Am I going to get my annual checkups? Am I doing all the things we should be talking about? The same thing with mental health. I have a therapist, I go to see a therapist, I have two coaches. I regularly looking at ways to expand my own mental well being and just the state of mind that I have as I interact in this world. Because we all have the struggles. We live in an age where things are hard and it's challenging and we're comparing all the time and things aren't working out the way we want.

And boy, if I don't have these tools and these things that I'm dedicated and committed to, I could easily go back to that state of mind that had me almost land six feet under like my good friend, my buddy Brandon and others. And you know, we just have to have that conversation. I just got off the phone with my old high school football coach and I'm going down there to share a little bit in a couple weeks actually on Brandon's birthday, the irony there, his birthday again, where I'm going to kind of do this event and do all these Burpees and hopefully raise a bunch of money, more money until then.

And everybody will do the check ins on that day, the 14th. And it just so happened that I was going to our old high school to speak on another topic. And so I called my coach and said, let's figure out how to extend this. And he continued to talk about how they lost a person to suicide last year. And I could just sense how hard it was to talk about it. Even though it's a year removed, it's just there's something so heavy and deep about mental health and the struggles. And again, we don't see that with the cancers, with the heart diseases, with the strokes, those things happen.

People go and you know, we remember them, we honor them, we talk about them, we laugh, we love, we have all the memories. But then when it comes to this kind of thing, it's much different. And I get it to a certain extent, but again, we have to normalize the conversation and, and he doesn't necessarily know if that's done to the, to the, to the greatest ability. And you know, I said, look, let me come in. This is what I do. I get to speak, you know, as a profession and I get to share stories and articulate and get people engaged and moved and inspired to think about things a little bit differently.

So again, like the whole point of all this conversation is how do we just keep talking about it? Part of that is checking with our people. Like, how do I keep checking? And one thing I wanted to hear, Jules, others if you're on. One of the things I asked is last week, would you be able to go throughout the week and create a bit of a how you doing list, a check in list. And did you, did you engage in any of those check ins? How did that go? I would love to hear some comments in here for those of you that did that, you know, did you go forward, did you make the list?

Did you do some check ins? What were the responses? Are you going to do a bunch of check ins on the 14th with me? I will put the pledge form, the fundraiser thing, and that's not necessarily about the money, but the check ins. I will put the campaign link in the community and would love to have you join in terms of that check in challenge. So I would love for you to drop in your comments as I kind of wrap up how this played out. If it played out. Jules, you did? Yes. Great. This is, this is exactly why we talk about this thing.

So how am I checking with my people? But then how am I engaging in the conversation, whether I'm sharing on social media, whether I'm sharing here with you, sharing with family, sharing with friends. How do I just get real about it? And again, it's a sensitive topic. It's so sensitive. Feels so sensitive. And it shouldn't. It shouldn't feel that sensitive. But I did that and I was worried and I hesitated to actually make it really that clear. The problem was when I first brought this to social media in the campaign and I introduced it, I tried to skate around that and not make it so clear that this is the connection.

Here's my buddy, here's suicide here, fundraiser, all the things. And it just didn't go really far. It didn't take off. And I was a little bit like, what do I do? Do I keep doing this? And, you know, two days later I'm like, it's not about me. It's not about. I'm just going to keep pushing. And, you know, I was pretty blunt about it. And I put the fundraiser link there and it shows his face. And I talked about the number of deaths and I talked about all the things. And wouldn't you have, it kind of took off and people were so, so generous.

So we have to just continue to talk about it. And by the way, one of his uncles had commented on another area or something, and he said, just thank you for just being honest with this kind of thing. And it just reaffirmed that we can talk about this. People know what they know, and this kind of thing is real. And whether we talk about it or not, it's still there and people will still feel it. But when we can talk about it, when we can engage, we can really kind of support each other in that way.

Yeah, look at that, Jules. That's beautiful. That's beautiful. Most were good. One shed tears and hugs, said, you hit his heart by asking. I mean, that right there makes the whole conversation for me from last week and this week all worth it, because that's the kind of thing we just don't know. And that's what that lady said to me as I was walking away. She said, jason, just thank you. You just never know who needs to hear something and who is watching. So please keep doing it. So Jules and others that are here and that are participating, please keep doing it.

And, you know, I'm a person, like, I got so many things going on, I gotta have that list. And I just keep kicking it out. A couple days and a couple days and a couple days. It's my little reminder with my list of people. I'm gonna keep doing that. Hopefully I just do that until I can't do it anymore or somehow my brain is able to just naturally do that without a list. But for now, that's what I'll do. And, you know, again, it's just about continuing to have that conversation and check in. Otherwise, guess what?

If we play the same games, we're going to win the same prizes, and prizes is not the right word. But guess what? 6 million people attempting suicide last year, 50,000 of them successful. That's going to happen next year and it's going to happen the year after and the year after. Unless we can interrupt and try to do something different. My therapist, who I had a conversation with, yes, I have a therapist, like I said. And yes, I talk about mental health and statistics outside of just what my own needs.

She told me that 80% of people who get to that state of mind can actually make it with a little support. They don't actually want life to be over, but they just don't know how to get out of the pain. She's saying 20%. There's not much that can be done, but for 80%, imagine that 80% of people who get to that point could actually be swayed. Maybe it is just a question. To your point, Jules, you hit the heart by asking. We just never know. And I always like to say this. We know the result when we don't do anything.

It's gonna be the same result. It's gonna be the same thing. If I don't do anything to impact a situation, I don't take any action. Nothing is gonna change. Nothing's gonna change the outcome if I do. We don't know. I don't know what's gonna change. I don't know if it's gonna impact. Someone's gonna turn their day, if it's gonna turn their life at the end of the day. I know what happens if I don't. I sometimes learn what happens if I do. And so this woman, thankfully she shared that because again, I don't always know these things.

I don't know when we none of us know the impact that we actually have. But I promise you, it is had. There is an impact. People feel this. People benefit from this. People value conversation and true check ins. And I just ask you to continue doing that. So I will not be on next Sunday night. I likely do a Monday serenity. I will be out of the area where I'll get any kind of Internet. So I look forward to seeing you probably Monday night. Stay tuned, and I will go back into the community like I said, and I'll drop the campaign link in there so that you can sign up to check in with your people on November 14th.

My buddy Brandon's birthday really would love it if you join that again, like the money thing. I'm not trying to ask anyone for money. Don't worry about that. But check in pledge, I would love it. Absolutely would love it. So go check in. Continue to do that this week. We'll come back next week and continue to talk about this thing. That's how it gets better. Have a great week, everyone.