There’s healthy venting and then there’s keeping your ex alive in every conversation. Let’s talk about how rumination and toxic venting impact your mental health, and how to actually move forward.
Good morning, cadre do to some technical D. Difficulty. I was not on at noon. I apologize. Um, but I'm back. It's 12, 15. I decided to hop on today. And just talk shortly about. Stop talking about your ex. I am Michelle. O'Connell. I'm a dating coach from unstuck by Michelle. And this is something that I think we all have experienced with. In either doing it ourselves. Hearing other people doing it. Just kind of, it's not uncommon, right? People are constantly talking about. Their ex and as a dating coach and as someone who's passionate.
About mental health. I know how impactful that can be on someone's mental. Health. So we know that healthy venting. Gives you an opportunity to process. Rumination keeps you stuck. Right. There's a difference between saying I'm hurt and I'm working on it. And repeating the same story with no desire to heal. Constantly talking about your ex is gonna activate your nervous system. Reinforce resentment and make the breakup feel like it's more present than it actually is. There's such thing as toxic.
Venting right. When every conversation. Becomes an opportunity to criticize blame or convince everyone that your ex was the problem. Right. That is toxic venting. So venting one time getting it out processing. Great. Maybe two, but when it's more than that, it becomes quite toxic. And it keeps that person living in your brain rent free, and that impacts your. Mental health, right? It makes you feel bad. It impacts your nervous system. And so if you have grief, about this relationship. If you have resentment, anger.
You're gonna benefit with your mental health by working through it. Right. Working through it with a therapist. Journaling allowing yourself to really feel those feelings, learn your lesson. Right. Learn whatever lesson it is from that relationship. But stop building your identity. From that relationship or what they did to you. Right. I'm just gonna be honest. People are sick of hearing about it. Um, I've been there. I've been on the other side. I've been there and it's hard because it's what you think about a lot.
And so you just talk. About it, but it, people are sick of it and it's not helpful for you, especially. If you want a date again, and you wanna date with intention and you wanna start feeling better. So again, stop building your world around what they did to you or that relationship and why it didn't. Didn't work out. You don't have to forget the relationship. No one is asking you to. Do that you just have to stop giving it so much air time. Heal release and move forward. So that's all I got for today.
Stop, stop talking about your ex (laugh) I'm. I'm making a post about this right now on Instagram. So check out my Instagram at unstuck by. Michelle check out my TikTok at unstuck by Michelle. Follow me on cadre to hear. Everything about dating and how it impacts mental health and how to date with more intention. And. If you have any questions, let me know. Have a lovely Tuesday.
